Words I Wish I Could Have Written

Since I'm by now known as the liberal heathen of BCF (didn't help that I skipped tonight for Taylor Mali), thought I'd include this poem that I heard tonight.

It was performed by Mali, but he got it from Shappy, whose clip I had once included here. Shappy has ridiculous delivery, full of sound effects, heavy breathing, and erratic pacing. The topic and analogies are so overdone, but he puts a nice spin on it, or he did when he spoke it at least, I hope it comes through for you:

George Bush
Please stop the war
Because I hate it
I hate the war
I hate all wars
Except for Star Wars
Which totally RULES!
Like a dictator rules
Which is what you are, George
A dick-tater
You are evil-like Darth Vader
But you don't look as cool as Darth Vader
He wore a black mask-like death
Which is what you are, George
Death
You wear a mask to hide your evil
Only it is not as cool and shiny as Darth Vader's
It is chipped and dented
Like the Millennium Falcon
Han Solo used to drive the Millennium Falcon
Until Boba Fett turned him in to Jabba the Hut
for a bounty
Jabba the Hutt is a fat, slimy businessman who lives
in a cave
Like Dick Cheney
Jabba the Hutt surrounded himself with bounty hunters
and evil robots and naked alien chicks
Just like you and Dick Cheney
George Bush doesn't care about Sand People!
And I hate to ruin the whole Star Wars Trilogy for you
George but in the end-the evil empire is toppled!
And although I bet you are thinking I am talking about
Iraq, I'm actually talking about YOU and your
administration, George!
The rebels win, George!
Those stupid peace-loving rebels WIN!
And you can appoint as many Jar Jar Binks want in the
senate but it's not gonna stop the rebels from
WINNING!
We got Yoda on our side, bitch!
All you got is some smelly old man in a robe who kills
people-like your dad!
Which is why I love Star Wars
But not wars in General... Grievous?