Dearest Ellie's Cat ("Milo," though Jim seems to be under the impression that you are "Kiki"):
Why do you hate me? Why must you scratch me and abuse my laptop? Why must you stare at me with such angry eyes? Most cats love me. LOVE ME. Dogs, too. And even some kids (of the goat variety, though the human kind digs me, too). Basically, EVERYONE LOVES ME. Even the Band Man has cats that love me. But you. Oh, you. I thought we had something going there, how I'd scratch you and you'd just sit there and purr. But no. You had to start clawing. And sleeping where I wanted to sleep. And tapping your paws all over my laptop. And trying to shut down Dakota the Computer. And leaving red welts on my arms. And drinking out of the toilet when I try go to the bathroom in need of a good pee. And the leaping and the hitting. Why, Milo, why can't we be friends? Now I must shut the door behind me wherever I go because this apartment ain't big enough for the two of us.
Sincerely bleeding,
Scared in Cambridge
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