Testosterone, Testosterone, 1 2 3

I heart This American Life. Tonight, listening again to one of my favorite episodes, I just had to share a snippet. The episode is called 'Testosterone,' and about how the hormone affects a person, including a story from a guy that had no testosterone for awhile and just felt the life drain out of him. He wasn't depressed. Just lethargic. My favorite part of the show was when the whole staff at TAL took a test to see who had the most testosterone. All of the guys wanted to win though none of the girls did. (But no girl wanted to be last either, no one wants to be seen as a door mat.) Now, bear in mind that TAL is a show on public radio that focuses on a different topic each week. It's pretty geeky. Bookish. Nerdy. So no one guy seemed to have a clear advantage. Then, the results came. David Rakoff. An author and contributor to the show, who says delicious things like, "As far as I'm concerned, the whole point of living in New York City is staying indoors. You want greenery? Order the spinach," he won out among the men.

Here's the host, explaining his disbelief: Rakoff, the gay, Canadian Jew living in Manhattan [beat all of us].

Rakoff: Ok, we really have to dispense of the Canadian. Actually, that is non-corollary. Believe me.

The results were so dramatic that he had 50% more testosterone than the next highest guy. The revelation brought many chuckles, but also distressed one staff member, Todd, who scored the lowest.

Todd, explaining why he's upset: That at least someone would be girlier than I. If I can't be the most manly in public radio, where the hell can I be the most manly? Like, I kind of wish this was Sportcenter, 'cause then I'd be ok, if out of all my fellow staff at Sportscenter, if I had the least testosterone, I'd be fine with that, but in public radio..."

Rakoff, hearing this idea, was excited for another office testing: We should get all of them to spit. Is it a real place? Sportscenter? Is it a thing?

Todd: Now see, that's not fair! How can he, how can he out of all of us, have the most testosterone and not know what Sportscenter is? I know what Sportscenter is!

And that exclamation, my friends, made me giggle out loud in my flat, sitting in front of my laptop with headphones on, with roommates who must think I'm insane or sped. Whatever, yo. I don't care. At least I don't have to worry about testosteone levels.