'05 For Fighting

Big Adjustments:
1. Aleve pills changed their shape and I did not notice until recently. They're circular now. They used to be oval. But still that shade of pale blue.

2. 7:30am. Rise and shine. During the past semester, I rarely slept past 8 am on the weekdays. It was sickening, even to myself. I didn't enjoy rising early, but I always had a paper I had to finish because I bailed too early the night before.

3. I'm older than I was last year. By a year.

4. The mass. Biggest fluctuation since my horizontal growth spurts in junior high. (In those years, I'd grow by maybe a quarter of an inch the same year I'd gain twenty pounds. It was really weird.) If I was on friendlier terms with Excel I'd plot the mass changes. And I would say that the plot looks like a rollercoaster ride, if only I enjoyed rollercoasters and they did not make me dizzy or ill.

5. Mailboxes. We live on a busy road. And somehow, of all the houses along this busy road, our mailbox gets damaged the most. We replace them more often than babies do diapers. Every time I go home, there's a different one. Today, ours is gray and metal.

New in '05:
1. The gadgets. This was the year of the cellphone, the shuffle, and the digicam, spread out at the beginning, middle, and end of 2005. I was a latecomer, but I have finally joined the world of technology. Now if only someone would teach me about this information super highway.

2. Professors. And academics. We saw more of each other than necessary. So much more. Dinners. Lunches. Coffee. Classes. Office hours. Review sessions. Colloquiums. Dreams. (Nightmares) Every year, I promise myself the academics will not be as bad as what I had endured the previous semester. And every year, I lament that this was my "hardest semester yet." This, was no exception. But through it all, I drew my strength from the shining green light at the harbor- the hope of Scotland.

3. Would you like fries with that? Cooking for myself for long stretches of time. Having my own kitchen. Making real dishes beyond sandwiches, pasta, and leftover medley. I hope cooking is still fun by the end of next year, after a semester of living in a 'self-catered flat.' (Luke: That means you have to cook for yourself, you know that, right?)

4. Respect, utter respect, for the kilogram and the people behind its making. And within that same journey, realizing that sometimes, a scotch glass really is a great short cut. And cake pans. Those two containers together can really rule the world.

5. Backpack. Ditched the Eastpak of WA (and half of my Bo' career) for a green, not-big-enough- for-the-biochem-binder-but-then-again-what-was, Puma backpack. I think there's a Morrocan flag on it?

Runner Ups Who Have Had A Big Year:
1. Women writers. I hate that distinction as much as Christian musicians or socially conscious corporations, but all the ones I've fallen for this year happen to be women. Guess they're just better people. Lorrie Moore. Flannery O'Connor (again) Alice Munro (much deeper, in recent days). You add to that a little of Sybille Bedford and newfound understanding for Didion, and well, that's a lot of admiration and a lot of stories to read.

2. Milanos. Only the double chocolate and mint ones. And they're especially great when I get to give them away. Best way to spend extra Polar Points ever.

3. Orientals. Huge year for them (well, they are industrious and they do make good use of their years). And that term.

4. The idea of awkwardness. I was reluctant to list it because it's in overuse, but really, that's the word that best sums up my year and half of the folks I know. Don't worry. Awkwardity has been sealed up, quarantined, and shipped off into a safe location. We'll try not to mention it for a few days.

You know what? I don't really want to make five of these things, so we'll just wrap it up here, a'ight? I'll see you next year.