Running on Empty

What kind of drug store runs out of cold medication?  A drug store next to a world-class teaching hospital during flu season, apparently.  A drug store without drugs is as ridiculous as a grocery store without groceries.  Oh, wait, we've seen that happen, too.  Honestly, people, does capitalism mean nothing to you?  Are you trying to lose money?  We're not in Soviet Russia anymore, you know.  Or China.  Or Cuba.  Especially not Cuba.  They don't even have to stand in line for stuff.  They have a great state-run healthcare system.  

I like to buy the sort of cold medication that's behind the counter, because illicit drugs are fun and pseudoephrine works wonders.  When I didn't see any generic version of the multi-symptom cold medication I wanted (generics are just as good, always go with generics, down with big pharma!), I opted for Tylenol, picked up the card, and went to the counter.

Counter Lady: I'm sorry, we're out of this.

Moi: Do you have the generic Drug Store Not to Be Named kind?

Counter Lady: (searches around) What are your symptoms?

Moi: I just have a cold.  

Counter Lady: (impatient) What are your symptoms?

Moi: Nasal congestion, and-

Counter Lady: (runs away before I could finish, picks up a generic allergy med, consults with co-worker if it's right for me, decides against it, and comes back to me with Sudafed)  You don't need the other one.  Here's Sudafed.

Moi: But-

Counter Lady: (look of death)

And thus I reluctantly bought the Sudafed that only covered one third of my symptoms.  Then took some of my own painkillers to cover the rest, forgetting there was also caffeine in them.  Now my chest feels funny.